BREAKING NEWS
Report by Sven Waldbruder, ANN
Updated April 1, 2021

atWar World Headquarters, Djibouti -- a group of dejected, angry nerds were seen leaving the atWar head offices earlier today. Anonymous sources tell us a heated meeting took place between CEO and well-known egomaniac hothead, Dave, and the atWar Moderation Team, which apparently ended with Dave quoted as saying "I'm tired of this sh*t, you're all fired!"

A short time later, with no Moderators around to stop them, a small group of communist activists, and one guy wearing a sailor hat, were seen infiltrating the building. Witnesses reported hearing gunfire erupt inside. No one has exited the building since, and the whereabouts of Mr. Dave, who was believed to be inside at the time, are as yet unknown.

Meanwhile, a group calling themselves the People's Socialist Front of the Revolutionary People's Army (PSFRPA) released a statement on the Twitter account @we_love_stalin which read: "We, the comrades of the PFSRPA, declare the workers paradise of atWar is now established for all time. Brothers and sisters, join us to make atWar fair and equitable for all. Also, please subscribe to our YouTube channel. Thank you."

A spokesman for the PSFRPA, who declined to be named, explained several of the changes being put into effect immediately: "from now on, there will be no more losers on atWar. Everyone will receive an equal share of the SP winnings, even when they don't play. Duels will gain ELO to BOTH players. Premium subscriptions and ProtoCoins will be given for free. Everything will be perfect and wonderful, unlike all the other communist utopias which were tried and failed before us. This time, we will get it right."

We reached out to several members of the atWar Supporter Team for comment, but as of the time of this writing we have not received any response. According to sources, it seems the Supporters are unsure which side to support in the current power struggle.

We did speak with Mr. Jerko Mbumba, CEO of Discount Web Servers of Djibouti, the company which hosts atWar. According to Mbumba, atWar's March invoice has not been paid and, unless arrangements are made, the servers are scheduled to be shut down at Midnight April 1st, Djibouti Central Time.

When asked about the server situation, the PSFRPA spokesman told us: "it's not a problem... we are sending a copy of Das Kapital to every employee (both of them) at Discount Web Servers of Djibouti. We are sure they will see the error of their capitalist ways and give us the servers we need for free."

A random citizen we confronted on the street in search of a quote for the opposing viewpoint said, "who the f*ck is Atwar? I don't know him. Stop asking me questions."

  |

Коментари

Купи премиум да би сакрио све рекламе.
Коментари: 23   Посвећено од стране: 448 users
01.04.2021 - 01:36
 Dave (Админ)
FAKE NEWS
----
All men can see these tactics whereby I conquer,
but what none can see is the strategy out of which victory is evolved.
--Sun Tzu

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01.04.2021 - 01:37
Написао HENERAL LUNA, 01.04.2021 at 01:36

APRIL FOOLS. HAHAHA
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01.04.2021 - 02:01
Написао Dave, 01.04.2021 at 01:36

FAKE NEWS

Praise be Allah, the rebels have unbanned me and now I will lead the charge against you !
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01.04.2021 - 02:04
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01.04.2021 - 02:35
Ahhahaahahhaahahaahhahahahhahha
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01.04.2021 - 03:09
It where the mongols
----
Alexander conquered the Egypt when he was 21.
Mehmed the second conquered constantinopel when he was 21.
What have you done?
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01.04.2021 - 03:30
Why rebels didn't free Waffell? Are they real communists or capitalist scums that are trying to show themselves as communist?
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01.04.2021 - 03:54
For a short time...
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01.04.2021 - 05:10
Didn't laf
----
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01.04.2021 - 05:39
Its real guys


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Meso
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01.04.2021 - 05:51
Is this a true story?
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USA USA USA
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01.04.2021 - 06:29
Wait did u say communist activists. Gimme the location asap
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01.04.2021 - 06:31
Написао Metyu, 01.04.2021 at 03:30

Why rebels didn't free Waffell? Are they real communists or capitalist scums that are trying to show themselves as communist?

If people started calling themselves i love stalin. Thats some hardline communist. Even far radical for me
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01.04.2021 - 07:31
Написао Mesopotamia, 01.04.2021 at 05:39



Now we for sure know that it's fake, this is not AW HQ!!!!
Real AW HQ:

Other supporters (except me) are not listed here, because they are homeless.
(Supporters net salary on AW is 10$ per year)
----

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01.04.2021 - 08:36
 Nero (Модератор)
We can finally get rid of that self-centered, hot-headed, out of control prick known as Dave. Ever since taking over, he's done nothing but bring ruin to this game. Sid is next.

Long live the Revolution!
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Laochra¹: i pray to the great zizou, that my tb stops the airtrans of the yellow infidel
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01.04.2021 - 09:12
Написао Nero, 01.04.2021 at 08:36

We can finally get rid of that self-centered, hot-headed, out of control prick known as Dave. Ever since taking over, he's done nothing but bring ruin to this game. Sid is next.

Long live the Revolution!

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01.04.2021 - 10:26
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01.04.2021 - 10:54
 Agel
And what are the news? Terrorists attacks and pirate raids in Djibouti is a daily occurence.
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01.04.2021 - 10:55
 Agel
Написао Metyu, 01.04.2021 at 03:30

Why rebels didn't free Waffell? Are they real communists or capitalist scums that are trying to show themselves as communist?

Waffel better imprisoned for tha sake of my sanity.
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01.04.2021 - 11:12
How this affects Scen community? , anyways time to search for a new owner, im willing to pay 2 dollars for atwar.
----


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01.04.2021 - 19:33
What s**t of anticomunist fascist neocon stup**ity is this?
Slava Lenin!
Long live socialism, comunism and anarchist theories!
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18.04.2021 - 05:59
Написао Pavle, 01.04.2021 at 07:31

Написао Mesopotamia, 01.04.2021 at 05:39



Now we for sure know that it's fake, this is not AW HQ!!!!
Real AW HQ:

Other supporters (except me) are not listed here, because they are homeless.
(Supporters net salary on AW is 10$ per year)

i like how u call ur hourse 'nicest' in all dijibouti. so if i were to get this straight nero and sid sleep in the hall while the upstairs is shared and u got great neighbours. k send cords. imma send some sandy bois there. i like how u say this is 'still' amok's and ivans room xa
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18.04.2021 - 06:04
Написао Nero, 01.04.2021 at 08:36

We can finally get rid of that self-centered, hot-headed, out of control prick known as Dave. Ever since taking over, he's done nothing but bring ruin to this game. Sid is next.

Long live the Revolution!

В победе бессмертных идей коммунизма
Мы видим грядущее нашей страны,
И Красному знамени славной Отчизны
Мы будем всегда беззаветно верны!
glory and faith to the everlasting revolution
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